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There’s that moment of panic after you receive certain phone calls.
Your heart races, emotion floods into every cell of your being and your mind begins to spin. Thoughts darts around like a computer on warp speed.. you can almost physically feel it stabbing through the connections and synapses in the brain.
It scours every corner of your mind to seek a solution to the problem. Every avenue is explored; every possible decision and probable outcome is calculated. In a matter of moments, the brain reaches it’s final destination. All of the “logistics” have been assessed and a solution is revealed in startling clarity. I call it…
“The Plan”
Your breathing begins to slow, a sense of calm and resolute determination takes its place. All you need to do is begin with Step One and go ahead from there. The “Thinking” portion of your mind takes over from the “Feeling” and, with fortitude, each raw step of action is taken.
You know that you just need to follow The Plan”… it’s how you move from “this side of The Problem or Crisis” … to the other side. It’s how we can move from our lost equilibrium through instability and back to homeostasis once again. If we just stick with The Plan, add a few quick prayers and calls to friends and family, everything else will fall into place.
Now, I’m know you’ll recall how I’ve missed having my son at home… how I’d pondered locking him up in his room at Christmas and you can just imagine that I couldn’t wait to fly out to visit again. Soon enough, play-offs would be over and we could have him back again. Just last week, my son was mentioning that he, too, was looking forward to seeing his friends… Just not like this!
First… there was a text-messaged photo of an elbow (at which point the overwrought parent (me) insisted it must be broken). The next day, Physio…then an x-ray and an appointment with an orthopaedic surgeon. You have to know that with a health care system like ours, the rapid pace of these decisions was a red flag. Sure enough, the last phone call was to tell me our son was booked for surgery the following day. It was broken… had been broken for several months in fact… he’d just played through the pain…
That’s when the moment of panic I’ve just described began, which subsided with the formation of “The Plan”. My plane ticket was booked, bag packed and the next four days flew by in a blur. But, and I am ever so grateful, it was a systematic and smoothly run “blur”… I know that’s not always the case.
Well, now He’s home again… albeit with a huge cast on one arm… the bickering between the two siblings has begun, and there couldn’t be sweeter music to my ears.
I can’t say that I loved doing the five loads of washing, but now his clothes are clean and nicely tucked in… and so is he, well, sort-of…
I have to say, on that 6 hour drive home, I could sense that shift… the same one I felt when gazing at my daughter’s profile, not that many years ago. I could feel that separateness between us, that distinction between the boy who is my son and the young man who is his own person with a life and identity separate from me.
Somehow, somewhere… between the then and now, the there and the here… my son has become a man…
You also know that I’ve shipped out various boxes of brownies and cookies, chocolates and gift-cards over the past few months. Had this not happened, I’m certain I would have flown out with a box of these cookies next. I could tell you that they have magical super-powers intended for the fast healing of broken bones… that they are just packed full of “good for you” stuff… but I think they’re just home-made, mom-made, little bites of love and I know nothing cures faster than that!
For those of you familiar with the original Heartland Cafe… these are those addictive cookies we used to make for you and we all pretended they were good for us;)
Heartland Nutri Cookies
- 1 cup soft margarine
- 1 cup brown sugar
- 2 eggs
- 1/8 cup buttermilk
- 1 cup all-purpose flour
- 1 cup whole wheat flour
- 2 cups oatmeal
- 1/3 cup bran
- 1 tsp baking soda
- 1 tsp baking powder
- 3/4 cup chocolate chips
- 1/4 cup slivered almonds
- 1/4 cup pecans
- 1/4 cup sunflower seeds
- Cream margarine and sugar together until light and fluffy.
- Add eggs one at a time and continue mixing.
- Add buttermilk and then all dry ingredients, mixing well.
- Form into 4 oz balls and flatten to 1/2? and space 1-1/2? apart.
- Bake at 325° F for 15-20 minutes.
- Makes 16 large cookies.
Cookies that you can pretend are good for you? Hell yeah, am I making these.
By all means… please do, they are delicious:)
I can just imagine the terrible time you’ve been through. I’m sure I’ve been there. I’ve had the late night phone calls from police stations and hospitals and drunken friends and felt the anxiety and helplessness of the whatever the situation. Somewhere between the boy and the man is a really difficult time – for the mother! And I do know because I’m still there. Enjoy the time at home with your son. I hope he is good to you!
Well, let’s pray for the end of these phone calls… Sounds like you’ve been there a few times.. Take care, Smidge
Big Hug Smidge!!!! I know how hard it is to get this kind of news. You feel so helpless when then live so far away. It sounds like he well on his way to recovery with daily treats and love from mom. By the way your cookies look divine too! BAM
He is… Everything’s getting back to normal now:) Thanks so much!
This is post is so beautiful written. I am sorry to hear about your son’s broken elbow and the distress that it caused you his loving Mum. I hope he makes a total recovery in the quickest time possible. By the way I love the idea of the cookies having magical super powers. 😉
Wouldn’t that be grand? Imagine what a fun world.. Doctors would prescribe cookies:) xo Smidge
I know the feeling about boys becoming men, when you suspect that they really don’t ‘need’ your mothering any longer. One thing’s for sure though; all of us still need ‘family’. That never seems to change. 🙂
How quickly they become “little boys” again when they’re sick;) Have a lovely day! Xo Smidge
Oh no! I’m so glad he’s ok. There are amazing healing powers found in love from mom (and cookies, of course!).
It might interest you to know that a study showed that food prepared with a loving mother’s hands actually tasted better.. so maybe it can heal:)
Glad he is back home and under your protective wing Smidge!
Me, too, Cheryl!! It was a crazy week… well, only 4 days, but it felt like a week! I think it was just the fact that it was long distance that was so upsetting. And the hospital just kept routing my phone calls in circles until I kept hitting a voice-mail. Very tough to manage everything from here… it was a huge relief to fly out there and be where I needed to be to take care of him. He’s feeling so much better but still on Tylenol 3’s.
xo Smidge
Oh dear Smidge! You described it all so well, I was nearly right there with you on that journey, from panic to plan. (Of course your photos didn’t hurt that cause a bit either!) I’m assuming that you have your man-son there with you for a only relatively short time, but I know you’ll be packing all kinds of love-that-heals onto his plate while he’s there! I’ll be thinking of you, and you with him, in the coming days. And I’ll make a batch of these healing cookies too. xo!
I think he’s going to be here until he gets the urge to travel with his team again. Rest then rehab it is for the time being:) Thanks for stopping by, spree:)
Smidge, I love your blog for its diversity, the little anecdotes, and for your recipes. Therefore, and but naturally, you are one of my choices for the Versatile Blogger Award.
Do drop by at http://averilgomes.wordpress.com/2012/02/06/the-versatile-blogger-award/
Averil, you are just so sweet to give me this blog… thank you so much. I have already received this award but that doesn’t make it any less special. I’ll be delighted to visit your blog!! Thank you!! xo Smidge
Oh dear, I can just imagine the anxiety you went through. Your son is lucky to have a family who loves him so much and a mother who makes cokkies with magical healing properties. Will have to give them a go as we are a very accident prone couple!
Hahaha, well, no promises on those cookies being magical… I can’t imagine you being accident prone at all, you are so skillful when cooking and writing your blog posts:) I wouldn’t mind hearing a few of those stories!! xo Smidge
Such a well-written post, Smidge, and the accompanying photography was beautiful! You gave us a glimpse into what must be one of the most dreaded experiences of parenthood. I’m glad his injury was no more severe than it was and that, seemingly, things have returned to normal. Whew!
Well, I was just recalling a few of your stories from childhood… your mom must have had a few moments like these;) We all go on to tell the story of “that time when I…” and it’s all good… after the fact:) Thanks so much, John!
Well, these would make me feel better!
And I would fedex you some if I could:)
“I have to say, on that 6 hour drive home, I could sense that shift… the same one I felt when gazing at my daughter’s profile, not that many years ago. I could feel that separateness between us, that distinction between the boy who is my son and the young man who is his own person with a life and identity separate from me.”
As a father of 13-year-old girl, this chills me to the bone. Very powerful post.
You should be the next Martha Stewart!
You’re intelligent, crafty – in a good way – engaging, cute as a button and most of all, I don’t want to kill you!
In short, you rock!
Wow! What a treat it was to scroll down and read this comment today:) I know your daughter will (and already has) turned out beautifully… how could she not with a dad like you! Well.. Martha Stewart, that would be a fun title to hold.. I’ve seen so many beautiful bloggers out there I think I’d have some stiff competition! I have to say, I laughed when you said “I don’t want to kill you!” Isn’t it true!! xo Smidge
A cookie that’s good for me, well, you know I’m sold. 😉 These sound deeelicious!
Yes, we have been contemplating exactly this sort of adrenaline-blasting, strategy-lightning thing ever since we got the message last week about our nephew’s band-mate’s death. The first thing you think when a family member says “sad news” or “bad news” is a conglomeration of every worst-case-scenario known to humankind, an inventory of which family member is most directly affected, how soon you can get there to pitch in, and whether anything will ever seem safe or sane again. I’m sorry to hear about the broken elbow and know that, while it will likely heal fine now that it’s been mended, it’s a serious setback for an athlete. Sorrier yet about the anxiety and pain for all. But very grateful that a loving mother’s care and support and a good bout of verbal sibling fisticuffs have come to the aid of the ailing–medicines that almost invariably give one a new lease on life at any age. He’s a man and independent now in the usual ways, yes, but will always need you in the most important ways too.
Many HUGS!
I’ve gone to see your posts after reading this… my experience, while challenging and upsetting is nothing compared to what some families face. I felt so sad for you and your loved ones when catching up on your news… Sending you <3 (hearts) and xoxo Smidge
The photos are stunning and make the post even more interesting and beautiful! 🙂 Time flies and children tend to grow so quickly! And thanks for sharing the recipe ^^
You’re so welcome.. time didn’t seem to fly until after they graduated from Grade 12… something about that final step, I guess! That couldn’t have been that long ago for you:) xo Smidge
I’m so glad your son is on the mend, Smidge, and I think we all felt the memory of that moment of panic along with you. Having his mom make him a plate of these lovely cookies has to be the best medicine!
You know what they say about Mom’s cooking… even if she (or I guess he) is a terrible cook… the loving that mixes in makes it taste the best:) xo Smidge
So well written Smidge. I could feel your anxiety as a mother, I’m so glad your son is on the well to health once again. Beautiful calming photos!
We sure are as well, thanks so much:) xo Smidge
I can feel you dear Barbara, I am so glad your son is there with you and he is on the heal… I wish him to get well soon. These photographs show me how your winter days… To be honest makes me afraid… But sure, so beautiful photographs, Thank you dear Barbara, Blessing and Happiness for you all, with my love, nia
I am so happy to have him home and be able to look after him. We had an incredible doctor and the nurses were also fantastic. These photos were cool because the day we drove home a dense fog had settled everywhere for miles… it was the prettiest sight with hoar frost everywhere. I made Phil take pictures on my iphone… no camera with me this time! xo Smidge
Oh, I can imagine the panic and worries you went through. My daughter also broke her arm almost a year ago on our last night in France. What an ordeal it was to be in the hospital, to go through x-ray and the application of the cast.
Glad to know that your son is on the mend. He’ll be just fine.
Sounds like you know exactly what we went through. I’m also glad your daughter is fine again:) xo Smidge
What gorgeous photos!
Thank you:) Not bad for an iphone, eh?
Oh, wow, it sounds like you have been through the wringer! Glad to hear your son is on the mend and safe at home. I bet these cookies are the perfect welcome home snack. 🙂
Yes… we’re can go back to the Sunday night cookie baking, but now I can bake any time because he’s out of school:)
Hope things look up for you…how could they not with those amazing cookies! Love the sunflower seeds in them!
Everything worked out in the end, thanks so much for your words today:)
I’m glad your son is doing better–though I don’t have kids, I always dread those late night phone calls thinking that it might be bad news from my family. That first ring always puts me on alert.
Your cookies would no doubt make anyone feel better–I know they would me. 🙂
Those have to be the all-time worst thing, I agree!
Just look at all that snow. I am just so happy we haven’t really had any huge snow storms this year because I don’t think I could’ve taken it lol. But these cookies look so scrumptious. I bet they are amazing when eaten warm.
To be honest, this was a photo of the mountains on the way home to Alberta when I brought Phil (and all his washing:P) home. There is absolutely no snow anywhere here right now. Now a pretty sight I have to say, but great for getting around!
I’m so glad your son has had his surgery and is recovering. I’m also glad that you’ve reached this side of the worry. 🙂 I hope he recovers well.
That’s what we were thinking, we just needed to get the surgery done and then we’ve turned the corner to the healing side:) He’s been doing so great, thanks so much for asking!
Wonderful pictures – and the cookies sound wonderful. I really need to get into the kitchen and do some serious baking.
I’m back making a bunch of stuff for a fund-raiser Bake Sale we’re having here. Lots of fun and I’m so happy to help.. it’s the Brown-Bag program that gives kids lunch at school when they don’t have their own…
When you said long story, I didn’t think it was this! You described it so eloquently.
My kids are small, 7 and 2 and a half but I honestly dread the day they will grow and become their own adults.Some how when they are small you “feel” like you can protect them, help them make better choices and yet you know that you need to let them go so that they can bloom .
I am glad your son is home and safe and I wish him a speedy recovery.
You are so right on wanting to protect them… for the most part we’ve been able to. Every now and then something like this comes up. I think Phil really grew up having to go to the doctors and specialists on his own.. but was he ever glad to come home:)
That is the sweetest post, you sound like such a fantastic mother and your son sounds like one tough cookie, there’s no way I could ignore a broken arm for months.
I loved the Kensington Heartland Café, but I’ve never had the pleasure of trying those cookies. Thanks for posting, I’m definitely going to attempt making these at home.
I know… how could he not feel that it was broken?? Gotta scratch my head on that one, I guess he is pretty tough! I’m making these cookies for our Bake Sale:) So if you’re there you’ll be able to try them! I have to make a second batch.. the kids (aka my son) ate a bunch tonight:)
I couldn’t read through the story fast enough to get to the happy ending. Your son is very fortunate that he has such a caring mom. Our healthcare system is indeed a mess of quandries — we complain if we’re not processed through quickly enough, and then owe do catch a break and are pushed through the system at warp speed, then we wonder how truly ill we are. It’s kinda sad, really. Glad it all worked out for your son. The cookies look delicious.
Pretend?!?!?! What, you mean they aren’t good for me?!?!?!?! CRAP!!!! =) This is a great recipe!! Thnx! Have you seen the new site yet?!?!?!?!
Hahaha, what new site??? Yours??Now I’m excited with all of those ?!
Yes, I got my own domain. =) But you already know that, you’ve been there. I just approved your comment!! Thanks for stopping by! Just wanna be able to do my own thing…I’ll see you around!
I know all about those phone calls and the resulting Plan. I’m so glad to hear that your son is all taken care of and tucked in at home with you, safe and becoming sound of body (elbow). 🙂
The cookies sound really good!
What a story ! And what a lovely ending 🙂
Phone calls can turn your life upside-down! I know! So glad that you have your young man home and I am sure the cookies will make everything better… I could use about 3 dozen right now… maybe more! I love your photography, it is amazing….
Hi, Ruth! He has been healing pretty amazingly, kids do recover so much quicker than someone my age! After the first few rough days he’s on track and every day it’s better. Off the Tylenol 3’s and onto regular extra-strength:)